Tuesday 1 April 2014

Pioneer Trail To Diversify

One of the most common things we hear at Frontierville Express is "it's all the same" when it comes to game mechanics and missions. Because of this Zynga have taken steps to diversify the game by merging it with a number of other in-house titles.

"The blunt reality is games can only do so many things," said April Twyllo, Zynga's head of Impossible Problem Solving. "It would be illogical and potentially dangerous to just keep filling games with new code and mechanics... but hey, it'll be fun!

"After all, if many different games can do a few different things each, the hastily sewn together storybook creature created by a merging of those games will soon open up new and interesting avenues for confusing players."

Each game will be accessed via the Cabin Menu and bring whole new ways of playing!

Pioneer Safari

Ever wanted to see your favourite Homesteaders heads pop as a Monkey shoots them from a catapult? Wait no longer!

Be careful of the Jacques Bubbles... you can pop them, but they come back again and again and again!


Oh dear, it seems Granny has a new hobby... Will you cure or kill?

Pioneer Trail Wars

Keep your homestead safe by paying increasingly large amounts of money to a shady character that arrives once a week... (18+)


A great educational tool! Teach children where their food comes from by slaughtering your homestead animals and turning them into food to sell to ungrateful customers who judge you on being given a rose instead of the quality of your dishes.

"We hope the new range of Combo Games will alleviate all player complaints of having to play the same game every day and will in no way become clumsy overweight leviathans that take a week to load and cause unexpected server fires," said Twyllo.

"But just in case, have a complimentary Zynga branded Fire Extinguisher... you need to ask each other for the trigger handle though."

Zynga also hope this will get past problematic issues like Developers needing to eat and sleep as a UN Humanitarian Force recently shut down the company's Dev Farms. At these pleasant rural hideaways coders were being kept in a permanent state of conciousness with an IV drip of "Zyngose", a patented concoction of Red Bull, cheetah semen and coffee you could tar a flat roof with.